I tried it before.. .

And I failed..
As u all can obviously see..
My scars are gone..
But the memory stayed in my heart..
How i struggled to breathe.. And the reason for it...
Is now forgotten..
Once in high school...
I deliberately changed myself..
For GOD, for my health..
For the sake of having a normal life...
Now I've almost forgotten the incident..

But with this current crisis..

I've been thinking about it...

again..

and again...

I've reached to the point of finally making the decision..

Until..

Teddy's face came to my mind... How she made me promised not to do so...

Then Jazz's voice kept repeating in my head bout how she loved me....

B's voice, harsh words and promises long time ago.. saying "If you kill yourself.. I will be following on soon after..."...

Akiko's face and her threats to kill me if I make anymore suicide attempts...

Saiyari's words that concern's bout me....

Everything came back! on how I shouldn't waste/lose my life over a bastard who can't stop himself from wanting to marry a bimbo that's 20 years younger than him..

You want a bimbo? You got one! One that will run your money out and not give u any children!

Look at me! I'm laughing at you right now!
But tears are still streaming down my cheeks

Suicide was in consideration..

But it's gone now...
I know you guys prayed for me..
Thank You...

Amy Ramli-Still dying-